Friday, October 1, 2010

The Sweetest Trolls #9: Family Reunion -- #FridayFlash

This is the nineth installment of the Troll Serial. To read from the beginning, or to find past and future installments 
click here.


Kratan and Kutril ran as if they were being followed by an army in armor and horses. When they were too far from civilization to worry, they slowed to a trot. 

"Where," said Kratan panting, "are we going?"

"To my uncle's." 

"What?" Kratan halted. "No way. I'm not going to that lunatic's house." 

Kutril turned to his friend, saying in all seriousness, "You're right, my uncle is bohoo," he spun his finger around his ear, "but he's the only one who can help us."

Kratan sat right there and started humming. 

Kutril paced. "We don't have much time, you know?" he said. 


"The sun, dumb-dumb."

Kratan frowned and banged his club on the floor. "You're right, we have no one else to ask help to." He got up, "Ow, my head hurts."

"That's what you get for thinking too much. C'mon, if we hurry we may get to his cave before the sun comes up."

"Okay, but we'll stop for water on the way, right? I'm thirsty."

"Sure thing, let's go."

They headed north, further into the woods. In about one hour they started climbing hard rock. 

"Not even goats can climb this mountain," whined Kratan. 

"Sure they can, the problem is that they're diur, durn... You know, they live in daylight."

"What a shame." 

"Yeah, abandoning that farm full of goats," said Kutril with dreamy eyes. He sighed, shaking the thought away. "Let's go. I'm sure uncle will have water for us," said Kutril. 

This gave Kratan a burst of energy and soon they arrived in a plateau. Looking back and down, they could see the forest and beyond it the tiny village lit up again. To their right, at distance, there was a large city with a great castle at its southern border. Both Katran and Kutril shuddered at its sight.

"Uh, oh," said Kutril, "we should be there by now."

"What? You don't know where your uncle lives?"

"I know where it is," replied the Kutril, "it's just that I haven't visited him in such a long time. Or he could have moved."

Katran glared, Kutril shurgged, and they resumed their climbing until they reached the top of the mountain, which they found to be the base of a mountain range.  

"What an idiot!" said Kutril.

"Stop calling me that," said Kratan.

"No, I'm the idiot. I forgot that uncle lived in the middle of many mountains." Kutril snorted.

"You bet you're an idiot," said someone behind them. "I could hear your noisy panting ass from the woods below."

Katran and Kutril screamed their lungs off for the second time that night. They turned to be slapped in the face by and old and greasy troll. Kutril vented loudly. 

"Why are you here, stupid nephew of mine?"

"I-we need help uncle." 

"Tell me something new." 

"Humans are chasing us." 

Kreptus rapped his knuckles against Krutril's skull. "That's nothing new dumb-ass; follow me."

Kratan and Kutril followed the old troll down the other side of the mountain through natural and carved passageways, arriving at the entry of a Kreptus' large and deep house. 

"You've got to be kidding uncle!" 

"What?" said Kreptus looking back. 

"We'll have to get wet, that's what!" Kutril could not believe his uncle lived behind a waterfall. 


Kutril glared, and Kratan spun his finger, hidden behind his friend. 

"Tomorrow I'll show you the dry entry, now you can stop licking your damned lips and drink as much as you like in your way in."

"You mean there's a dry entry and you showed us the wet one?" said the indignant Kutril. 

"We don't have time for the dry entry. Look up sweetie."

They all looked up and the stars had disappeared. 

"Let's go," said Kratan and Kutril, in unison with Kutril's fart.

They devoured the second meal Kreptus provided despite not being that hungry anymore. Kratan and Kutril nodded at each other, in a silent agreement as not to reveal that they had already eaten today, knowing how dangerous Kreptus could become.

As they sat back patting at their full stomaches Kreptus asked, "You're not staying long, are you? I'm old and I can't hunt for more than one."

"Well hunt too?" said Kratan tentatively.

Kreptus seemed not having heard him.

"We have nowhere else to go uncle," pleaded Kutril.

Kreptus crossed his arms furrowing his brow. 

"Well hunt?" said Kutril. 

Kreptus waved them off. "If you're getting your own food, you can stay."

Krutril smiled broadly. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me yet; there's one condition."

Kutril shrunk, Kratan sighed. 

Kreptus flashed a sour look at Kratan and continued, looking at Kutril. "No contact with humans."

"But," tried Kutril.

"Whatsoever," said Kreptus, flatly.

Kutril's shoulders fell. "Not even girls and nice knights?"

"No girls! Wait," said Kreptus, leaning forward, "did you just say knights?"

"He's nice?" said Kutril, shrinking.

"No damned knight is nice!" 

"But we met one who warned us about the villagers coming after us," said Kutril with a childish voice.

"And he explained Kutril's farting," said Kratan, almost in a whisper.

Kreptus rubbed his face vigorously. "Did he wear a shiny silver armor?"

"I don't know if it was made of silver, uncle."

Kreptus snorted. "Okay then," he said, tapping his fingers on his knee, his jaw set, "did he have black hair and white eyes?"

"Yes! And his horse was white. I wanted to taste it but I was too scared to try, besides, the knight was nice with us."

"He was scary too," added Kratan, slowly.

"But he didn't try to kill us, right?" said Kutril. Kratan shook his head emphatically, and Kutril asked, "Do you know him, uncle?"

"Yes, I do know him, and you idiots know him too," replied Kreptus, forgetting to ignore Kratan. 

Note: This is the last installment written during WeSeWrimo, so from now on you'll be free of the bragging badged, heh. ;)


  1. Sigh. Reminds me of my family. Just kidding. :)

    I love the uncle and the fact that he made them get wet. Delightful episode, Mari!

    Keeps on getting better, does this series.

  2. --Gracie: Oh, I hope it's a joke! :)

    Glad you're enjoying it so far. I've got some surprises coming up soon, heh.

  3. Nice to see the "boys" again after last week. :)

  4. I know I've missed a couple of episodes, but it's great to see Katran and Kutril are still up to theirn old tricks. And who is the knight? I can't wait to find out.

  5. --vandamir: Thanks! :)

    --Sam: Welcome back! The mystery will be revealed soon, hheh.

  6. These guys are so fun. Now I can't wait to hear how they know the knight.

  7. Cool! What an interesting turn of events. I can't wait to find out how they know the knight. :)

  8. --Valerie and Cathy (ganymeder): Kratan and Kutril are intrigued as you both. ;)

  9. Wait...they know the knight? Love the uncle!

  10. Kreptus is fabulous! I wonder how he knows the knight... :)

  11. --Laura and Jemi: I too have a thing for cranky characters, heh. It's much fun writing Kreptus!

  12. Noooo! Don't stop now! They know the knight? You're going to make us wait, aren't you?

  13. If they were ogres you'd have gotten twice the serial episodes out of them, at the very least. But for trolls, I guess they did decently. A credit to their race.

  14. --Alan: This time I'll let the action flow a bit. I'll get back to the bowing village after some more of the trolls. So no waiting besides the regular week. :)

    --John: You're up to quite a surprise Mr. Ogre. Just wait and see. ;P

  15. Another great installment. These trolls are always a blast. I can't wait to get to the bottom of the knight mystery.

  16. Love all the goat talk. Heh heh. I knew there was something up with that knight. The suspense is killing me!

  17. --Laurita: Sorry, hehe. I'll do my best to give some information on him, and his reasons, soon. Promise. :)

  18. Oh! How does he know the knight?! So many questions!


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